Often, people who interact with abusers have difficulties objectively seeing the situation they’re in. In their minds, they may justify the abuse and find ways to ‘make the situation right’. However, there are blatant signs of psychological abuse that are hard to ignore. Read to find out more.
People in abusive relationships are often the people who least notice it because of the emotional attachments that have formed throughout time. As previously mentioned, one of the biggest hurdles for people to recognize abusive relationships is when they justify their partner or loved one’s behavior.
These justifications results from the confusion that the psychological abuse represents. Some of the common thoughts of people being abused include:
- “I deserve this treatment towards me”
- “I wasn’t a good person towards him/her so that’s why things are like this”
- “Maybe I’m the problem”
These self-defeating thoughts romanticize the idea of abusive behaviors, which further gives way to worsening treatment by their partners. This is why it is important to understand the telltale signs of psychological abuse. See if you or someone you know are experiencing these following signs.
Loss of confidence
When understanding the signs of abuse, it may be helpful to look back from who you were before the relationship. People may have viewed you as someone who is always confident and happy. If you have noticed personality changes when you stepped into this relationship, it could be a sign of abuse.
Loss of confidence happens when your partner overtly or covertly attempts to bring you down through their words and actions. Instead of criticizing you constructively, they find ways to rudely comment on your appearance, your interests, or your capabilities as a person.
Another obvious sign of psychological abuse is a feeling of confusion. Although not all confusing feelings in your relationship necessarily mean you’re being abused, but something to remember is the frequency of these feelings.
When psychological abusers use their language and actions to manipulate you, you will often feel a sense of indecisiveness in many areas of your life. Manipulation is a tool for them to control you and your sense of self. When someone is abusing you, they want you to feel unsure about your self and your decisions so they can gain control even more.
Again, it is important to look back on who you were before the relationship. If you have seen yourself as a self-assured person in the past but have been more emotionally disturbed and confused now, this could be a sign of abuse.
Having some insecurities are typical–many people experience them and they find ways to manage insecurities through healthy relationships with others.
In an abusive relationship, you may find yourself having insecurities that are growing day by day. You may feel like your partner will take you for granted any minute due to their actions, you don’t feel good about yourself, and you always find yourself in a self-defeating attitude. These insecurities often stem from verbal and emotional abuse that people experience with their loved ones. The lack of respect and neglect may cause you to wonder if you’re worth your partner’s time and attention.
When people experience the pain of abuse, they don’t necessarily take it towards others. Some of them would project this pain towards themselves through self-harm. They may be engaging in excessive alcohol, smoking, using drugs, or hurting themselves physically to numb themselves with the pain of psychological abuse. Aside from mental health concerns, these addictions may negatively impact the overall wellness of the individual.
If you noticed that you are experiencing symptoms of self-harm, it may be best to get help. There are available dual diagnosis treatment centers that can help address issues of addiction and recovering from the trauma of psychological abuse.
There is strength in awareness
Abusive behavior isn’t something that you simply ignore. It can cost you your well-being, and even your life. As you read through this signs, keep in mind that it can save you or someone. Truly, there is strength in being aware and finding a way out of abusive relationships.